Tuesday, July 1, 2008


On a deeply philosophical note... I was watching the Bachelorette last night;) pleasantly enjoying the episode where the scorned men "tell all". I cannot count how many times the saying "Everything Happens for a Reason" came up. Cute when explaining why Gorgeous Hunk A was passed over for Gorgeous Hunk B, because we all know that Hunk A will find a substitute hot sexy wife and his heart will be magically healed just in time for US Magazine to print a spoiler before the final show airs.

But isn't overuse of that phrase really dangerous? The more people say it the more the idea really catches on that truly everything happens for a reason. And I beg to differ. I advocate getting rid of that stupid saying. It really only works when a great outcome happens after only a marginally bad bump on the road of life is hit. If you marry a really great guy after your first scumbag husband leaves you, did scumbag husband leaving "Happen for a Reason?" Maybe. But what if first husband was really great, and was hit by a drunk driver? Does the phrase work now? Does the "Everything" include child sexual abuse, suicide bombers killing innocents, murder, rape? Offensive isn't it.

This topic leads me into my frustration with people attributing trials to God. God does not give people trials!!! I hear this annoying lie all the time: "God gives us trials so we can learn and grow from them." The God I know is not the author of pain, illness, sickness, or anything ugly at all. We are subject to trials in this life because this is a fallen world, and we agreed to come here, gain a physical body and be tested. We were given agency. If I get cancer, did God give it to me? I say No. I have figured out that the bad stuff is just the contractual, unavoidable yang to the beatiful yin of the world. There must be opposition in all things for His beatiful plan to work. But when that opposition falls on His sweet children? I believe that he weeps for us before we even hear the bad news. Or he lights a path for us before it begins to get dark. I have figured out that infertility is one of the trials that I am going through, but God did not take away my fertility. I know that the Savior Jesus Christ knows exactly what I feel like, especially on the tough days. We do experience trials so we can learn and grow. And our Heavenly Father and His son Jesus Christ can help us learn from the trials we face, cope with them, and even overcome them. But did they create them? No way.

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