Many infertile people hate being around pregnant people. Lucky for me, other people being pregnant does not bother me. Not at all. Especially people who have already had a baby or more. That seems really normal and natural to me. More power to you. I also don't even get bothered by seeing teenagers or skanks be pregnant. Evily, I sometimes even think "you better be a good mom or that kid might be mine anyway". ( -I am sure I will later regret writing and even thinking that one, but hey, full disclosure for now.)
I don't feel like another person getting pregnant decreases the baby supply or changes my chances for success.
I also have never for one nanosecond felt like I would not be a mother someday. For infertiles, motherhood is ultimately a choice not a physical ability.
Babies and children do not make me sad. If they are cute and sort of naughty, I find them entertaining. If they are not so cute and annoying they make me happy to be childless, so win win for me. I have never been around a kid or baby and wished they were mine, and I have actually had a few people insinuate this ABOUT THEIR OWN KIDS. Hey, rock on people. I am really glad that motherhood gives you healthy delusions about how awesome your kid is. I was raised by a mother who suffered from the blinders syndrome and it did wonders for my self esteem. It is a gift and creates great parents so I won't bag on it, but I will laugh at you and post about you on my blog for thinking your mini Zach Effron/Tchaikovsky baby will either A: make me sad and jealous or B: Heal me of all wounds or C: Cause me to start plotting my baby-heist.
I'll help you out: The correct answer is D: None of the above.
My aunt with IF said it best "I don't want your baby or a baby, I just want my baby."
....Or kid or teenager or elephant. Whatever. So long as its mine.
2 comments:
I'm happy to know all this. I undertand about the skank/teen comment - I've thought worse.
You are a very neat person. Since I have naughty kids, I'll say "your welcome" for any entertainment they may offer you.
"Zach Efron/Tchaikovsky baby" this made me laugh so hard. You are hilarious. Even though I haven't struggled with infertility I kind of know what you mean about not wanting "your baby or a baby, just my baby" Because before I had kids I didn't like children much, and to be honest even though I like them a lot more now I don't like other peoples kids nearly as much as my own.
I also like what you said about Motherhood ultimately being a choice. That was very profound.
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