I hate long flights, but I love watching tons of newly released movies, back to back. Yes it is good to read. But movies are truly my time-killing medium of choice. So despite the fact that I had two good books to read, I choose to forgo Catcher in the Rye and said hello to eight or so movies. (Sidenote: Transformers II was so bad it made time move slower and made my chair more uncomfortable.)
The last three movies I watched were:
Julie and Julia: I ADORE food and always dream of quitting my job to go to culinary school. However, I do not dream of working as a chef. Just going to culinary school, thereby making that move almost completely non-practical. Because of my love of all things food I had been anxiously awaiting the release of this movie. It did not disappoint. It did however, take me by surprise that Julia Child had wanted children and had been unable to have them. This was not a large part of the movie, only part of two brief scenes, but of course this was the primary theme of her life to me. Infertility completely shaped the person she became. I loved the depiction of her marriage in the movie. It seemed like she was married to a wonderful man and had a great marriage. I have a great marriage. I don't like to say this out loud too much because it sounds like bragging, and could be hurtful. I know enough wonderful people with terrible marriages to know that my marriage isn't so much a product of anything I have done, as it is a product of good luck. And I am very, very thankful for that stroke of luck.
Next was The Time Travellers Wife. *SPOILER ALERT* The lead character in this movie is determined to have a baby and experiences multiple miscarriages. Very sad part for me, but I handled OK. Later in the flight H watched the movie. I glanced over at him and saw that he was crying. Crying?! I have only seen H cry once in the ten years I have known him. I didn't want to make him feel embarrassed so I pretended not to see, and I checked out what could have made him cry. It was the part in the movie where they finally learn that the pregnancy will work and they will have a daughter. Man that tore me up. Full fledged ripping of my heart. I put my head down on my tray table and pretended to sleep, but really cried for a good long time. More determined than ever to try IFV. It is ssssssssssoooooo the least I can do for H.
After my sleep/cry meltdown I didn't want to risk another chick flick so I began watching UP. Are you kidding me!? Miscarriage and infertility in a Pixar?! Back to the tray table for meltdown number two. Didn't finish that movie. Don't get me wrong. I love when the sadness of infertility gets it's proper nod. It makes me feel not so alone. And just to prove that I don't need to be hospitalized or something, I will also justify my episodes by saying that I was on my period and hadn't slept in over 24 hours. I guess I should have told that to the stranger sitting next to me. That would have made me seem so much more stable.